. 1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.
During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.
2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain
One night, at 11:30 p.m., an elderly African-American woman was standing on the side of an Alabamahighway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s.. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance a! nd pu t her into a taxicab. She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached.. It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away.. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others." Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.
3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked. "Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it. "Well, how muc h is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream,! paid th e cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies.. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.
4 - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the s ide of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery app! eared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, see ing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away". Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.
_________________
1.-Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
2.-We get too soon old und too late smart
3.-You've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything!
And so ends the daily lesson of life .. I thought it was worth the stealing .. oh yeh I snagged it from a friend she has some pretty good stuff to share and I thought it was worth the saveing .. hope you do to .
5.10.07
Old Truths..
Couldn't help myself.. today was just one of those days when I either was a old bat or just mean ..
30.7.07
A beautiful story
MY SON
This is great, take a moment to read it, it will make your day!
The ending will surprise you.
Take my Son
A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art.
When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.
About a month later, just before Christmas, there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.
He said, "Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art." The young man held out this package. "I know this isn't much. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this."
The father opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture. "Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift."
The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.
The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.
On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. "We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?"
There was silence.
Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, "We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one."
But the auctioneer persisted. "Will somebody bid for this painting. Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?"
Another voice angrily.. "We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Goghs, the Rembrandts. Get on with the real bids!"
But still the auctioneer continued. "The son! The son! Who'll take the son?"
Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. "I'll give $10 for the painting." Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.
"We have $10, who will bid $20?"
"Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters."
"$10 is the bid, won't someone bid $20?"
The crowd was becoming angry. They didn't want the picture of the son.
They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.
The auctioneer pounded the gavel. "Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!"
A man sitting on the second row shouted, "Now let's get on with the collection!"
The auctioneer laid down his gavel. "I'm sorry, the auction is over."
"What about the paintings?"
"I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.
The man who took the son gets everything!"
God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: "The son, the son, who'll take the son?"
Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.
FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE...THAT'S LOVE
(Author Unknown)
Please send this to people.
Do whatever you like, but remember that maybe "one" of the people you might have taken the time to send this to, may be just the person who needs to hear this message. You have a choice to make."
This is great, take a moment to read it, it will make your day!
The ending will surprise you.
Take my Son
A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art.
When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.
About a month later, just before Christmas, there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.
He said, "Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art." The young man held out this package. "I know this isn't much. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this."
The father opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture. "Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift."
The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.
The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.
On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. "We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?"
There was silence.
Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, "We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one."
But the auctioneer persisted. "Will somebody bid for this painting. Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?"
Another voice angrily.. "We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Goghs, the Rembrandts. Get on with the real bids!"
But still the auctioneer continued. "The son! The son! Who'll take the son?"
Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. "I'll give $10 for the painting." Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.
"We have $10, who will bid $20?"
"Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters."
"$10 is the bid, won't someone bid $20?"
The crowd was becoming angry. They didn't want the picture of the son.
They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.
The auctioneer pounded the gavel. "Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!"
A man sitting on the second row shouted, "Now let's get on with the collection!"
The auctioneer laid down his gavel. "I'm sorry, the auction is over."
"What about the paintings?"
"I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.
The man who took the son gets everything!"
God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: "The son, the son, who'll take the son?"
Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.
FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE...THAT'S LOVE
(Author Unknown)
Please send this to people.
Do whatever you like, but remember that maybe "one" of the people you might have taken the time to send this to, may be just the person who needs to hear this message. You have a choice to make."
28.7.07
Witch at the Stake
The Burning Times
~*******~
It is always the morning of my execution........I know they will come for me today.
Last night the jailor, pulling up his trousers,
Sneered, "Perhaps you'll fancy the pole They give you in the morning more than mine, Stubborn Bitch." I think He liked it better when I had strength And spirit enough to fight him. He is too stupid to lie just to torment me. I will welcome death, though the dying scares me... I was a healer -- how long ago? Oh, Gods, I cannot think straight anymore!
And I know That their gross insults tomy body will never mend. And the pain is constant, and they have sworn me That I will go to the fire conscious and aware. My Goddess, I am sick to my very soul with shame; At the last I gave them screaming what they wanted, Mouthed any obscenity they asked, I told them What they told me to say. My sanity remains Only because Your names go with me to the pyre, And the grave beyond, and only there.
Oh, Beloved, if I could only see you One last time, that your clean spirit's fire Could rid me of this filth and fear... The crowd gathers now. I hear them outside, laughing, festive - Gods grant I will be entertaining enough - I wonder if these pious souls who in the past Have asked my help will mourn me?
Well, I shall be glad to quit this stinking cell - The rats grow bolder as I decline - Oh, Mother, give me strength! I hear the guards outside. "What," I taunt, "three of you All for one small half-starved wench? Indeed, terrible I must be!" They have the grace to look ashamed, The youngest one grows pale and horrified At the sight of me; I delivered his wife Of a fine strong son not many weeks ago, But now I dare not ask how the child fares.
"Nay, you must carry me or drag me, My fine bravos - these ruined feet will never Bear my weight again. I fear I danced too long With your good priest and his fine Spanish boots."
They haul me to my feet and the pain - I will not scream again for their amusement! I must go naked, then, to my death before these fools? I would not have them see me so, who danced Naked for the Goddess, graceful and free, On winged feet without a trace of shame.
Their avaricious eyes defile me, as their Twisted priests defiled my body's temple... There are many strangers here in the square, Churchmen and villagers from all the country round - I am to be a marvelous, far-felt lesson, I see. They bind me to their stake, too tight, more agony - The splintering pole claws my raw back, My shoulders wrenched and cramping, the rough rope Burning my wrists. My legs will not support me, And I sag in my bonds, and I fill with terror, As a pitcher with muddy water.
A priest approaches - Oh, Goddess, must I suffer them even now? The crowd protests the cup in his hands. He exhorts them gently: his sect bears mercy towards all, Malice towards none, and might not even such as I Be saved at the bitter end?
I don't know this one. I fight to raise my head, To spit in his face, for one last shred of defiance - Mother of All, no! Not you - here! How have you come, Beloved, To trade your green robes for their black, Your antlered crown for their cross? Surely I dream, I dream...
But now I smell your clean scent, And your dear presence cloaks me in peace. Rage fires in your eyes, but your pure love Sustains me, strengthens me and warms me. You brush the hair back from my face - The cup you hold gently to my bruised lips I gave you At our handfasting - softly you whisper, "Drink deep of salvation, my dear love," And your voice, harsh with unshed tears, Rips at my soul and my own tears begin, and fully Do I drink of your deep eyes and the chalice, And the taste of the flying herbs burst upon my tongue, Belladonna, aconite, dark sweet dreams...
They are coming now with the fire. Almost you linger too long, haunted eyes on mine, But as sleep steals over me I see you melt Safely into the throng.
I am drifting now; I hear my mother singing, far away - Strange, she has been dead these many years - The pain is gone. I am a little girl again - I am safe, My mother is calling me and I run gladly into her arms...
But in the room I have left behind, someone has been careless With the supper, Mother, they must turn the spit faster, For I can smell the roasting meat burning, And the dinner guests are shouting... I wake in a cold sweat, and cannot drink From the glass you bring me.
Oh, sisters, hear: Our daughters must not dream these dreams! We must defend ourselves, stand with our brothers, And make the arsonists let us be.
Oh, sisters, hear: Never again, Never again the burning.
~*******~
It is always the morning of my execution........I know they will come for me today.
Last night the jailor, pulling up his trousers,
Sneered, "Perhaps you'll fancy the pole They give you in the morning more than mine, Stubborn Bitch." I think He liked it better when I had strength And spirit enough to fight him. He is too stupid to lie just to torment me. I will welcome death, though the dying scares me... I was a healer -- how long ago? Oh, Gods, I cannot think straight anymore!
And I know That their gross insults tomy body will never mend. And the pain is constant, and they have sworn me That I will go to the fire conscious and aware. My Goddess, I am sick to my very soul with shame; At the last I gave them screaming what they wanted, Mouthed any obscenity they asked, I told them What they told me to say. My sanity remains Only because Your names go with me to the pyre, And the grave beyond, and only there.
Oh, Beloved, if I could only see you One last time, that your clean spirit's fire Could rid me of this filth and fear... The crowd gathers now. I hear them outside, laughing, festive - Gods grant I will be entertaining enough - I wonder if these pious souls who in the past Have asked my help will mourn me?
Well, I shall be glad to quit this stinking cell - The rats grow bolder as I decline - Oh, Mother, give me strength! I hear the guards outside. "What," I taunt, "three of you All for one small half-starved wench? Indeed, terrible I must be!" They have the grace to look ashamed, The youngest one grows pale and horrified At the sight of me; I delivered his wife Of a fine strong son not many weeks ago, But now I dare not ask how the child fares.
"Nay, you must carry me or drag me, My fine bravos - these ruined feet will never Bear my weight again. I fear I danced too long With your good priest and his fine Spanish boots."
They haul me to my feet and the pain - I will not scream again for their amusement! I must go naked, then, to my death before these fools? I would not have them see me so, who danced Naked for the Goddess, graceful and free, On winged feet without a trace of shame.
Their avaricious eyes defile me, as their Twisted priests defiled my body's temple... There are many strangers here in the square, Churchmen and villagers from all the country round - I am to be a marvelous, far-felt lesson, I see. They bind me to their stake, too tight, more agony - The splintering pole claws my raw back, My shoulders wrenched and cramping, the rough rope Burning my wrists. My legs will not support me, And I sag in my bonds, and I fill with terror, As a pitcher with muddy water.
A priest approaches - Oh, Goddess, must I suffer them even now? The crowd protests the cup in his hands. He exhorts them gently: his sect bears mercy towards all, Malice towards none, and might not even such as I Be saved at the bitter end?
I don't know this one. I fight to raise my head, To spit in his face, for one last shred of defiance - Mother of All, no! Not you - here! How have you come, Beloved, To trade your green robes for their black, Your antlered crown for their cross? Surely I dream, I dream...
But now I smell your clean scent, And your dear presence cloaks me in peace. Rage fires in your eyes, but your pure love Sustains me, strengthens me and warms me. You brush the hair back from my face - The cup you hold gently to my bruised lips I gave you At our handfasting - softly you whisper, "Drink deep of salvation, my dear love," And your voice, harsh with unshed tears, Rips at my soul and my own tears begin, and fully Do I drink of your deep eyes and the chalice, And the taste of the flying herbs burst upon my tongue, Belladonna, aconite, dark sweet dreams...
They are coming now with the fire. Almost you linger too long, haunted eyes on mine, But as sleep steals over me I see you melt Safely into the throng.
I am drifting now; I hear my mother singing, far away - Strange, she has been dead these many years - The pain is gone. I am a little girl again - I am safe, My mother is calling me and I run gladly into her arms...
But in the room I have left behind, someone has been careless With the supper, Mother, they must turn the spit faster, For I can smell the roasting meat burning, And the dinner guests are shouting... I wake in a cold sweat, and cannot drink From the glass you bring me.
Oh, sisters, hear: Our daughters must not dream these dreams! We must defend ourselves, stand with our brothers, And make the arsonists let us be.
Oh, sisters, hear: Never again, Never again the burning.
********
the sin of Gluttony
NEVER HEARD CREATION EXPLAINED THIS WAY BEFORE!!!
In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles."
And they gained 10 pounds.
And Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them.
And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."
And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good."
Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds.
And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.
And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them.
And Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!"
And Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.
=======
Guess you know I am on a diet .. and not happy with my choices ..
<<>>
=========
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles."
And they gained 10 pounds.
And Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them.
And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."
And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good."
Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds.
And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.
And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them.
And Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!"
And Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.
=======
Guess you know I am on a diet .. and not happy with my choices ..
<<>>
=========
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
30.6.07
Priceless...
A good friend posted this at a board I visit and omg it was to funny to let get past me so have to share this with you so the laughter keeps rolling..
Subject: LIZARD BIRTHING If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out LOUD! Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet. Here's what happened: Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room. "He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious Dad, can you help?" I put my best lizard-healer statement on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do. "Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!" "Oh my! Gosh," my wife diagnosed after a minute. "She's having babies." "What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!" I was equally outraged "Hey, how can that be? I t thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I accused my wife. "Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" She inquired. (I actually think she said this sarcastically!) "No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth together). "Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed. "Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed me. (again with the sarcasm... you think?) By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it. "Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience", I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle of birth" "Oh, gross!" they shrieked. "Well, isn't T HAT just great! What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know. I really do think she was being snotty here, too. Don't you?) We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later. "We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted. "It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified. "Do something, Dad!" my son urged. "Okay, okay." Squeamishly , I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results. "Should I call 911," my eldest daughter wanted to know. "Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?) "Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap. "Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged. "I don 't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to him. Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing,but this boy is of her womb, for God's sake.) The Vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass. "What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested scientifically. "Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. And Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?" I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside. "Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked. "Oh, perfectly," the Vet assured us.. "This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen ... Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um....um...masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed, glancing at my wife. We were silent, absorbing this. "So Ernie's jus t...just... Excited." my wife offered. "Exactly," the vet replied, relieved that we understood. More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly. "What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness. Tears were now running down her face, laughing..."It's just...that...I'm picturing you pulling on its... its...teeny little..." she gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more. "That's enough," I warned. We thanked the Vet and hurriedly bundled he lizards and our son back into the car. "I know Ernie's really thankful for what you've done, Dad," he told me. "Oh, you have NO idea,". Closed mouth, my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter. 2 - Lizards - $140... 1 - Cage - $50... Trip to the Vet - $30... Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie.....Priceless Moral of the story - finish biology class - lizards lay eggs!
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my sides hurt I laughed so hard.. thanks O&W for shareing ..
Subject: LIZARD BIRTHING If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out LOUD! Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet. Here's what happened: Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room. "He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious Dad, can you help?" I put my best lizard-healer statement on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do. "Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!" "Oh my! Gosh," my wife diagnosed after a minute. "She's having babies." "What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!" I was equally outraged "Hey, how can that be? I t thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I accused my wife. "Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" She inquired. (I actually think she said this sarcastically!) "No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth together). "Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed. "Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed me. (again with the sarcasm... you think?) By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it. "Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience", I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle of birth" "Oh, gross!" they shrieked. "Well, isn't T HAT just great! What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know. I really do think she was being snotty here, too. Don't you?) We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later. "We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted. "It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified. "Do something, Dad!" my son urged. "Okay, okay." Squeamishly , I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results. "Should I call 911," my eldest daughter wanted to know. "Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?) "Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap. "Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged. "I don 't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to him. Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing,but this boy is of her womb, for God's sake.) The Vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass. "What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested scientifically. "Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. And Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?" I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside. "Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked. "Oh, perfectly," the Vet assured us.. "This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen ... Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um....um...masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed, glancing at my wife. We were silent, absorbing this. "So Ernie's jus t...just... Excited." my wife offered. "Exactly," the vet replied, relieved that we understood. More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly. "What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness. Tears were now running down her face, laughing..."It's just...that...I'm picturing you pulling on its... its...teeny little..." she gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more. "That's enough," I warned. We thanked the Vet and hurriedly bundled he lizards and our son back into the car. "I know Ernie's really thankful for what you've done, Dad," he told me. "Oh, you have NO idea,". Closed mouth, my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter. 2 - Lizards - $140... 1 - Cage - $50... Trip to the Vet - $30... Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie.....Priceless Moral of the story - finish biology class - lizards lay eggs!
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my sides hurt I laughed so hard.. thanks O&W for shareing ..
22.6.07
I guess.....
I need to learn how to talk better .. dunno its stupid how trying to give an honest complement could give me the case of funk I find my self in .. I was trying to say I liked her for her outlook and the fact she was nice to know but she said I was talking "down " to her like she was stupid .. That wasn't my intent but she took it that way... and it firkin bothered me that I couldn't even do one thing right with these people .. is there a special way to give a complement to some one? The lady is funny interesting and has lots of qualities I admire in a person and she said I was talking down to her .. that's really stupid .. now that I think about it I should realize that women don't do complements well they are afraid to accept them.. I wasn't trying to pander to this woman I was trying to say thanks for being yourself but my bad she took the wrong way.. yeh I got put in my place .. guess my shit don't stink good enough yanno .. .. just sad really that this happens but as I sit here thinking and blogging I realize we do lose people skills when we "live" on the Internet .. is it because we don't have the body language to take our cues from or the eyes to watch as we talk? I dunno, how much do others read folks like that for cues in how they react to us & I do miss that bit of extra in my daily interchanges on line .. I loved the fact that with a vid camera I could have that ..but seems most folks are afraid to use them..why ? We used to sit down and enjoy having coffee or such in each others homes .. how is this camera thing any different? Is it the distances or the fact we really don't know each other? making friends takes effort it usually starts with a complement and a laugh .. only I guess I need to learn how to do that better yanno? I don't know; really I am just bummed is all.
Anyone want to teach me the art of talking better to others ?
Anyone want to teach me the art of talking better to others ?
29.5.07
The Stranger at our house
A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on. As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors: Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But the stranger...he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies. If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind. Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.) Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but The stranger never felt obligated to honour them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home... Not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our long-time visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush. My Dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol. But the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing. I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... And NEVER asked to leave. More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures. His name?
We just call him "TV."
He has a younger sister now. We call her "Computer."
_________________
http://sezfoxie.blogspot.com/
It is not good for all our wishes to be filled; through sickness we recognize the value of health; through evil, the value of good; through hunger, the value of food; through exertion, the value of rest.
We just call him "TV."
He has a younger sister now. We call her "Computer."
_________________
http://sezfoxie.blogspot.com/
It is not good for all our wishes to be filled; through sickness we recognize the value of health; through evil, the value of good; through hunger, the value of food; through exertion, the value of rest.
13.5.07
Mothers Day walk down Memory Lane
BEING A MOM
Before I was a Mom
Before I was a Mom
I never tripped over toys orforgot words to a lullaby.I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom -I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom
Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put them down.
Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put them down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom -I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
Before I was a Mom -I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom -I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
Before I was a Mom -I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
Before I was a Mom.
@----->------
Happy Mothers Day everyone!!
2.5.07
The Burning Times Lyrics
I've had this song this pagan anthem of protest song in my files for a long time Its a beautiful piece written by a very talented man .. I first heard this in the um late 90s at a AOL place called the pagan tea house .. my friend Peter Conover was the singer and the words became majik to my ears .. This is a very powerful song you can use a tambor to keep time or a drum play with it sing it speak it let the words wash over you and take pleasure in the sounds of this song .. and remember ......
The Burning Times
By: Charlie Murphy
In the cool of evening, they used to gather'Neath stars in the meadows,
circled near an old oak tree
At the times appointed, by the seasons of the Earth,
And the phases of the moon
In the center often stood a woman
Equal with the others but respected for her work
One of the many we call the witches
The healers and the teachers of the wisdom of the Earth
And the people grew through the knowledge she gave them:
Herbs to heal their bodies, spells to make their spirits whole
Hear them chanting, healing incantations
Calling forth the wise ones, celebrating in dance and song.
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
There were those who came to power, through domination
And they bound it in the worship, of a dead man on a cross
They sought control, of the common people
By demanding allegiance, to the church of Rome
And the Pope declared the Inquisition
It was a war against the witches, whose power they had feared.
In this holocaust against the nature people
Nine million European women died.
And the tale is told of those who, by the hundred
Holding together, chose their death in the Sea
While chanting the praises of the Mother Goddess
A refusal of betrayal, people were dying to be free.
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Now the Earth is a witch, and the men still burn Her.
Stripping Her down with mining and the poisons of their wars.
But to us the Earth is a healer, a teacher, our mother
She weaves the web of life, that keeps us all alive
She gives us the visions to see through the chaos
She gives us our courage. It is our will to survive!
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna
31.3.07
Moving day
sheesh I hate to move BUT looking forwards to haveing a place by the window for my desk a big yard and a nice kitchen .. so with that thought in mind I am pulling the plug here for about a week and doing my thing.. wish me luck. I will be back soon to tell you about the adventure called moving to a new place
The Leaf and the Wind
Leaf looked out across the broad, dawn-pink sky and down over the beautiful spring garden. The dewy breeze grazed it and left it shimmering, fluttering. As it moved, Leaf saw all the corners of the garden with its flowers, bushes, trees and animals. Leaf stretched to catch every sight and sound. It was a new leaf at the top of a very old tree. Leaf adored all the elements - wind, sun and rain. But it was in love with the wind. Wind gave it the freedom of motion. Without the breeze it would never have seen the world below or from side to side. Wind rocked Leaf to sleep and shook it awake. Wind made Leaf dance. Wind whistled haunting tunes through the branches, it whispered and sometimes it even sang. On many days, Wind told Leaf of the places it had been. "All across the Rivers and down to the sea have I been," whispered Wind. On that day, Leaf could even smell the scent of the water and salty places of which Wind spoke. "High up the mountain to the very door of Heaven today," Wind told, as the fresh clean smells settled down upon Leaf. "I have seen where the Blue-sky ends and birds cease to wing. I have heard the voice of Life itself and it is so beautiful." Leaf shuddered with the thought of having Life speak to it as it did to Wind. "When will life speak to me?" Leaf asked Wind. The breeze warmed as it blew over Leaf and Wind said softly, "You can Hear Life's voice in me." Whenever it blew past, be it a breeze or gale, the little green leaf waved a joyful greeting to Wind - like the hand of a happy child to a loved one. "I will love you for all time," Leaf whispered to the moving air around it. "I could not be happier." Hearing this promise Tree itself shook and emitted a deep chuckle. "I am glad you are happy now," the tree said. "Enjoy your youth and beauty while you can, for soon enough you will be withered and brown, dry as dust and blown away with by the same breeze that stirs your heart today." Leaf stiffened at these words. The other leaves said nothing. One or two fell like tears before their time, so stricken were they by the sadness. "That is not so!" Leaf cried. Tree shook again and said, "Oh but it is true. I have seen many, many leaves from many trees fall and crumble. Your time will come to curse the wind and the way of things. Wind is old and you are young. Ask Wind sometime." The tree said no more. Leaf tried not to think about what Tree had said. Of course it had heard the stories of how leaves grow old and die, but still it would never be hateful. That very day, Leaf made a decision. It shouted to the world, "I will Never hate Wind. I will not give in to fear or unhappiness." Still, the next time Wind came to call, Leaf could not help but ask. "When I become old, dry and brittle will you destroy me as Tree says," Leaf asked. Wind was silent for a long moment. "I will not destroy you my dear one," Wind said. "All Earthly things grow old and dry. That is not my doing." Leaf was shaking and Wind could see the fear beginning to overtake Leaf. Wind added, "Keep your promise not to give in to hate and sorrow and when the time comes for you to fall, I will be there to catch you. It will be a beginning and not and end for you." Again Leaf felt strong. "Tell me of your travels," Leaf said. Wind spoke well into the night. Time passed. Leaf grew and changed. At first it became very big and strong. Then, as the air grew chill, Leaf began to take on the most magnificent colors. First a yellow cast and then little patches of red and gold began to creep across it. "You are most beautiful today," whispered Wind. "I do not think that of all the leaves in the world there is one to match you." Leaf shook a bit, knowing full well that many of the others had also begun to change and take on different hues. Still, the words brought joy. "It is the beginning of the end for you and all your kind," Tree said. "Soon now, oh so soon, you will be nothing but a speck in the dirt." All the other leaves began to droop and some even tumbled from their homes early as the weight of that unhappy thought dragged them down to Earth. Not Leaf. "Words, words, words," Leaf laughed. "You cannot harm me with words. I choose to be happy with my fate. Others choose to be sad. The only one who will be sad when I am gone is you old tree for then who will you talk to?" Tree shook with frustration and anger. "You will see," Tree bellowed. "You will be dirt!" As days passed Leaf began to feel thin and tired. The bright colors that covered Leaf darkened to brown and Leaf knew its time grew short. Still it would not be sad because each day now Wind told Leaf of the wonderful adventures that were to come. Just seeing Leaf cling to happiness while all those around it fell made Tree angry. One day it could stand it no more and when Wind came to call, Tree shook for all it was worth and Leaf snapped away from its branch and began to fall. Tree watched and waited for Leaf to scream and cry, to realize what horror had just befallen it. Instead Tree heard the sound of laughter. One moment Leaf was held fast to Tree and the next it was falling, flipping end over end. "I am flying!" Leaf laughed in pure joy. "You are falling! Plunging," shouted Tree. "I am soaring like a little bird," Leaf sang out. "See how I go!" Leaf felt something lift it up. It was Wind come to keep its promise. "I cannot take you far right now, just to rest on the ground. No matter what happens, do not be afraid. I will return for you." Wind carried Leaf ever so gently to the ground and allowed it to rest there. Leaf could feel the rumble of the roots from Tree as it laughed and said," You see? Now you are ready to become like all the others. It is all just as I said. Just give up now." Leaf was not stirred to sadness by Tree's words. It did not answer, but lay quietly looking up at the world. It all looked so different now. After a time, Leaf nodded off to sleep and a long time passed before it woke. Instead of feeling old, stiff and papery, Leaf felt suddenly free to move about. It could hear wind singing softly through the trees and felt itself being lifted and spun higher and higher. "Did I not promise all would be well," crooned Wind. "You have become the dust of the Earth, so light and so fine that I can carry you anywhere with me." And so Wind did carry the dust of Leaf and scattered it over fields, onto the backs of birds that flew to mountains and into streams that led to oceans. Finally Wind seeded the clouds with the last few tiny grains that were once Leaf and Leaf came back to Earth with rains and snows. Everywhere it fell the remains of Leaf brought a grain of pure joy, a drop Of hope and touch of love for wind and life. One day in springtime Wind rustled past Tree and heard Tree telling all the young leaves about the Leaf that had loved the Wind and perished in the dirt. Wind came back through Tree singing a breezy tune, "Listen my children, but not to those who tell you that your fate is in the dirt. Listen to me instead. I will tell the tale of how you will become Heaven's Dust. Believe and you will never dread." If ever you wonder which leaves listen to Wind and not Tree, look up on a stormy day and see, which ones wave, a joyous greeting and which fall down in sorrow.
Pandora ( a short story )
Pandora retold pagan style
The Maiden, being young and giddy, was watching the Men and Women as they played and laughed in the Garden one morning. She turned to the Fool, blinked her eyes, and said, "They are so fine and good, smiling all the time. How will they ever learn and grow if they have no obstacles; if there is no pain?"
And Trickster smiled a mad smile, and gave the Maiden a box. It was a small box, of something that might have been wood, but wasn't, and it had no lock on it. It did, however, have a small, neatly lettered sign on its lid.
Trickster pointed to the sign, and said, "That's called 'writing.' I haven't invented it yet."
"Oh," said the Maiden, "But what's in the box?"
"Oh," said Trickster, "You don't want to know!"
"I don't?" said the Maiden, slightly miffed, "But I'm Deity!"
"I know that," Trickster grinned, "But you still don't want to know."
"Well...all right." And the Maiden flounced away, very much put out.
Trickster watched Her go, and grinned. He then put the box down where the Maiden could see it whenever She looked in that direction, and sauntered away, eating an apple.
The Maiden looked at the box for several days.
"I wonder what's in there..." She would think to Herself. "That Person is always up to some trick."
Finally, Her curiosity got the best of Her, and She walked into the Garden and picked up the box.
She sat down under the apple tree, and spread Her skirts about Her, and placed the box on Her lap.
She looked at it for a long time, and then thought, "Well! A little peek inside can't do any harm..." And She opened the box.
Immediately, the lid sprang off, and a cloud of tiny things flew out! They were like flies, or mosquitoes, and they buzzed crazily about Her head for a moment, and then flew off in all directions.
Trickster stepped out from behind the tree.
"Well, now You've done it," He said.
"Done what?" asked the Maiden.
"Let loose what was in the box. Pain, and Suffering, and Envy, and Hatred, and Jealousy, and War, and Covetousness, and Sloth, and quite a lot more."
Just then, the box gave a great heave, and a very tiny, very bright little Something flew out.
Trickster smiled a warm smile, and said, "...and Hope. I'm an eternal optimist. Want an apple?"
"I guess so," said the Maiden. "What did it say on the lid, anyway?"
"The usual. You know, 'Do Not Open This Box.'"
"Oh. I guess I messed up, huh?"
He smiled at Her, and said, "Not really. We would have had to do it anyway, and this makes a better story, though they might get it wrong."
They both looked at the Men and Women, who were now sitting around on the grass arguing with each other. A couple of the Men were fighting, and a group of the Women were talking in whispers about another group of Women. Another Man had fenced off a section of the Garden, while another was coughing a little with a bewildered expression on his face.
"Excuse me for a bit," said Trickster. "I guess I have to be the One to finish this, and get them started up the Path."
He walked briskly over to the Men and Women, changing His Aspect as He went, until He appeared as a different sort of Being indeed.
"Time to leave," said the Angel to the Men and Women.
"Yes, we know," they answered, only half sadly, and the Men and the Women started out from the Garden, out on the Path Of Being Human.
Trickster watched them go, out from the Gates.
"Good luck..." He murmured, and he sheathed the Flaming Sword and closed the Gates of Innocence.
Thus it was, and so it is, and evermore shall be so!
The Maiden, being young and giddy, was watching the Men and Women as they played and laughed in the Garden one morning. She turned to the Fool, blinked her eyes, and said, "They are so fine and good, smiling all the time. How will they ever learn and grow if they have no obstacles; if there is no pain?"
And Trickster smiled a mad smile, and gave the Maiden a box. It was a small box, of something that might have been wood, but wasn't, and it had no lock on it. It did, however, have a small, neatly lettered sign on its lid.
Trickster pointed to the sign, and said, "That's called 'writing.' I haven't invented it yet."
"Oh," said the Maiden, "But what's in the box?"
"Oh," said Trickster, "You don't want to know!"
"I don't?" said the Maiden, slightly miffed, "But I'm Deity!"
"I know that," Trickster grinned, "But you still don't want to know."
"Well...all right." And the Maiden flounced away, very much put out.
Trickster watched Her go, and grinned. He then put the box down where the Maiden could see it whenever She looked in that direction, and sauntered away, eating an apple.
The Maiden looked at the box for several days.
"I wonder what's in there..." She would think to Herself. "That Person is always up to some trick."
Finally, Her curiosity got the best of Her, and She walked into the Garden and picked up the box.
She sat down under the apple tree, and spread Her skirts about Her, and placed the box on Her lap.
She looked at it for a long time, and then thought, "Well! A little peek inside can't do any harm..." And She opened the box.
Immediately, the lid sprang off, and a cloud of tiny things flew out! They were like flies, or mosquitoes, and they buzzed crazily about Her head for a moment, and then flew off in all directions.
Trickster stepped out from behind the tree.
"Well, now You've done it," He said.
"Done what?" asked the Maiden.
"Let loose what was in the box. Pain, and Suffering, and Envy, and Hatred, and Jealousy, and War, and Covetousness, and Sloth, and quite a lot more."
Just then, the box gave a great heave, and a very tiny, very bright little Something flew out.
Trickster smiled a warm smile, and said, "...and Hope. I'm an eternal optimist. Want an apple?"
"I guess so," said the Maiden. "What did it say on the lid, anyway?"
"The usual. You know, 'Do Not Open This Box.'"
"Oh. I guess I messed up, huh?"
He smiled at Her, and said, "Not really. We would have had to do it anyway, and this makes a better story, though they might get it wrong."
They both looked at the Men and Women, who were now sitting around on the grass arguing with each other. A couple of the Men were fighting, and a group of the Women were talking in whispers about another group of Women. Another Man had fenced off a section of the Garden, while another was coughing a little with a bewildered expression on his face.
"Excuse me for a bit," said Trickster. "I guess I have to be the One to finish this, and get them started up the Path."
He walked briskly over to the Men and Women, changing His Aspect as He went, until He appeared as a different sort of Being indeed.
"Time to leave," said the Angel to the Men and Women.
"Yes, we know," they answered, only half sadly, and the Men and the Women started out from the Garden, out on the Path Of Being Human.
Trickster watched them go, out from the Gates.
"Good luck..." He murmured, and he sheathed the Flaming Sword and closed the Gates of Innocence.
Thus it was, and so it is, and evermore shall be so!
28.3.07
HELP!! I gotta start tossing this junk!
STILL Packing, does it never end? oh I do wonder .. I got very early this morning to start on my computer cases and asst puter junks .. Just tossed out at least a 1000 old floppies from my first computer sheesh we have come along ways baby my new computer doesn't even have a floppy drive !!I have 5 keyboards 7 assorted colored mice ( all new never used or opened, I have to tell ya why; they are the regular old fashioned mouse .. sorry no good for me .. I use a marble ball mouse and will never go back to that damn squeaker style ) two new stacks of CD's and cords for speakers for power for pereferials and shesh you name it PLUS tons and tons of paper copy .. I saved everything it seems stuck it in a box and never looked at it again .. it is definitely toss time. I also have 4 complete computers and the towers for two more.. they all work to .. just need monitors is all sad part is I only use two the dell and the new gateway.. Guess I need to sell some stuff .. yeh!! yard sale time is coming up can do that really easy now since we now have a real yard to do it in.
I do believe we will have a good one to we have so much junk stuck away in a storage room or two .. baby stuff that needs to be sold off, toys , small accent stuff to make the house prettier than it already is .. I guess we are civilized pack-rats here an extra microwave we didn't have room for and everyone hated because of its size and all the complicated crap that ya had to deal with just to use it to reheat the coffee in yer cup .. TWO blenders? .. now how the hell did that happen?....oh yeh I was hunting thru the puter crap .. yep yep got 3 printers all used but they worked until I ran out of ink .. now why did I store them ?? cant buy ink for the one anymore its a very old style printer .. yanno the kind that used the folded paper .. loud pissy and ink gobbler I think that was the first printer I ever bought .. still hate to toss out working items .. bet most of you have the same issues with good working tools as well. well this one I know I have to toss cant buy ink for it anymore and not about to sell it to some poorer than me fool who only wants to have a slice of the great pie called computer toys. What else is here ? BOOKS on everything from your first computer to the idiots guide to repair to an aol handbook on learning how to computer .. omg that funny as hell to me because my first computer was an old Packard Bell- Windows 95 and had it hooked to aol because I didn't know any better. :: dies laughing now:: sheesh it still has the aol 3 on it now that's old stuff !! oh yeh I do still have the Packard Bell.. oh thats funny to see how far I have come since 1999 when I first got on line.. that old clunker let me into the world of la la land and let me learn to type .. spell checker was broken so that didn't happen and for some one like me who was not tech smart that was an awesome window .. what the hey the old clunker still works is just slow at times to load but has a ton of memory on it yep still good can set it up for the g/kids who like to play simple computer games .. OMG !! I gotta go thru some of those tossed floppies theres games on them for the kids that work on the Packard Bell!! See ya later I gotta get that bag outta the dumpster !!
I do believe we will have a good one to we have so much junk stuck away in a storage room or two .. baby stuff that needs to be sold off, toys , small accent stuff to make the house prettier than it already is .. I guess we are civilized pack-rats here an extra microwave we didn't have room for and everyone hated because of its size and all the complicated crap that ya had to deal with just to use it to reheat the coffee in yer cup .. TWO blenders? .. now how the hell did that happen?....oh yeh I was hunting thru the puter crap .. yep yep got 3 printers all used but they worked until I ran out of ink .. now why did I store them ?? cant buy ink for the one anymore its a very old style printer .. yanno the kind that used the folded paper .. loud pissy and ink gobbler I think that was the first printer I ever bought .. still hate to toss out working items .. bet most of you have the same issues with good working tools as well. well this one I know I have to toss cant buy ink for it anymore and not about to sell it to some poorer than me fool who only wants to have a slice of the great pie called computer toys. What else is here ? BOOKS on everything from your first computer to the idiots guide to repair to an aol handbook on learning how to computer .. omg that funny as hell to me because my first computer was an old Packard Bell- Windows 95 and had it hooked to aol because I didn't know any better. :: dies laughing now:: sheesh it still has the aol 3 on it now that's old stuff !! oh yeh I do still have the Packard Bell.. oh thats funny to see how far I have come since 1999 when I first got on line.. that old clunker let me into the world of la la land and let me learn to type .. spell checker was broken so that didn't happen and for some one like me who was not tech smart that was an awesome window .. what the hey the old clunker still works is just slow at times to load but has a ton of memory on it yep still good can set it up for the g/kids who like to play simple computer games .. OMG !! I gotta go thru some of those tossed floppies theres games on them for the kids that work on the Packard Bell!! See ya later I gotta get that bag outta the dumpster !!
20.3.07
In Sand & Stone
TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING THROUGH THE DESERT.
DURING SOME POINT OF THE JOURNEY,
THEY HAD AN ARGUMENT;
AND ONE FRIEND SLAPPED THE OTHER ONE IN THE FACE.
THE ONE WHO GOT SLAPPED WAS HURT,
BUT WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING,
WROTE IN THE SAND: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.
THEY KEPT ON WALKING, UNTIL THEY FOUND AN OASIS, WHERE THEY DECIDED TO TAKE A BATH
THE ONE WHO HAD BEEN SLAPPED GOT STUCK IN THE MIRE AND STARTED DROWNING, '
BUT THE FRIEND SAVED HIM.
AFTER HE RECOVERED FROM THE NEAR DROWNING,
HE WROTE ON A STONE: "TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE ".
THE FRIEND WHO HAD SLAPPED AND SAVED HIS BEST FRIEND ASKED HIM, "AFTER I HURT YOU,
YOU WROTE IN THE SAND AND NOW,
YOU WRITE ON A STONE, WHY?"
THE FRIEND REPLIED "WHEN SOMEONE HURTS US WE SHOULD WRITE IT DOWN IN SAND, WHERE WINDS OF FORGIVENESS CAN ERASE IT AWAY.
BUT, WHEN SOMEONE DOES SOMETHING GOOD FOR US,
WE MUST ENGRAVE IT IN STONE WHERE NO WIND CAN EVER ERASE IT."
LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE.
THEY SAY IT TAKES A MINUTE TO FIND A SPECIAL PERSON,
AN HOUR TO APPRECIATE THEM,
A DAY TO LOVE THEM,
BUT THEN AN ENTIRE LIFE TO FORGET THEM.
SEND THIS PHRASE TO THE PEOPLE YOU'LL NEVER FORGET.
I JUST DID.
IF YOU DON'T SEND IT TO ANYONE, IT MEANS YOU'RE IN A HURRY AND THAT YOU'VE FORGOTTEN YOUR FRIENDS.
TAKE THE TIME TO LIVE!
DO NOT VALUE THE THINGS YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE, BUT VALUE WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE !
AND IF I HAPPEN TO GET IT BACK,
THEN I KNOW MY PLACE IN YOUR LIFE
~*~
"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know whats inside until you take a bite"
* Forrests Gumps momma
So it is with friendships whether we make them on line or off.. I thought the story was a wonderful thing to share this morning and of course the quote from Mama Gump.. Na Not in a personal sharing mode today .. to busy packing up my house and getting ready for the move to a bigger place.. sheesh gotta go buy curtain rods for those windows, at least I don't have to paint its all done and everything looks nice and fresh. gonna be fun blending styles .. transitional modern with old victorian . I gotta go make a pot of coffee and get started this morning.. you all have a great day inn life hear? :: hands out a small chisel and a hammer for the stone work ahead::
make it a good one folks
/\
Foxie
19.3.07
Balloon story
A little boy blows up a balloon and starts flicking it all around the house with his finger. His mother tells him to stop it as he's liable to break something, but the boy continues. "Johnny!" Mom screams. "Knock it off." You're going to break something. He stops and eventually Mom leaves for a short trip to the shopping center. Johnny starts up with the balloon again after his mom has left for the store. He gives it one last flick and it lands in the toilet where he leaves it. Mom comes in and while putting away the grocery, gets the urge. A diarrhea run. She can hardly make it to the toilet in time and SPLASH, out it comes. When she's finished, she looks down and can't believe what she's seeing. She's not sure what this big brown thing is in the toilet! She calls her doctor. The doctor is baffled as she describes the situation, but he assures her he'll be over shortly to examine everything. When he arrives she leads him to the bath room and he gets down on his knees and takes a long, hard look at the thing. Finally, he takes out his pen and sort of touches it to see what it might be and POP! The balloon explodes and poop is everywhere. On him, the walls, etc.
"Doctor! Doctor! Are you all right?" she asks. He says, "I've been in this business for over 30 years, and this is the first time I've ever actually seen a fart !"-
"Doctor! Doctor! Are you all right?" she asks. He says, "I've been in this business for over 30 years, and this is the first time I've ever actually seen a fart !"-
~*~
You're laughing aren't you..I know you are!!!
You're laughing aren't you..I know you are!!!
18.3.07
Oh Joy .. Packing up
getting ready to move .. sheesh didnt relize we had so much stuff.. kinda a downsize yet its not that bad a deal, going from a 4 bedroom to a 3 bedroom but the trade off is worth it .. the 4 bedroom is a walk up flat on the 2 floor of the building no yard for my grand kids and no place to park .. the new place is a 3 bedroom street level with a yard and off street parking plus a city park right accross the street & still with in walking distance of everything we want or need not so bad.. still shareing a bed room with my granddaughter but no biggie but the new place has a dinning room and lots of windows and such. anyways all this stuff!! omg I gotta stop shopping.
21.2.07
The Woman Within
What a Woman Needs
One old love she can imagine going back to & new one who reminds her how far she has come.
Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own;
even if she never wants to or needs to.
Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour.
A youth she is content to leave behind &
A past juicy enough that she is looking forward to retelling it in her old age.
The realisation that she is actually going to have an old age, and some money set aside to fund it.
A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.
One friend who always makes her laugh;and one who lets her cry.
A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family.
Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.
A resume that is not even the slightest bit padded.
A feeling of control over her destiny.
~*~
Every Woman Should Know
- how to fall in love without losing herself.
- how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.
- when to try harder, and when to walk away.
- how to have a good time at a party she'd never choose to attend.
- how to ask for what she wants in a way that makes it most likely she'll get it.
- that she can't change the lenght of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.
- that her childhood may not have been perfect, but it is over.
- what she would and wouldn't do for love or more.
- how to live alone, even if she doesn't like it.
- whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally.
- where to go, be it to her best friend's kitchen table, or a charming inn in the woods when her soul needs soothing.
- what she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month, a year.
~*~
How to Recognize a Good Woman
A good woman is proud.
She respects herself and others.
She is aware of who she is;
she neither seeks definition from the person she is with,nor does she expect them to read her mind.
She is quite capable of articulationg her needs.
A good woman is hopeful.
She is strong enough to make all her dreams come true.
She knows love, therefore she gives love.
She recognizes that her love has great value and must be reciprocated.
If her love is taken for granted, it soon disappears.
A good woman has a dash of inspiration and a dabble of endurance.
She knows that she will, at times, have to inspire others to reach the potential the Gods gave them.
A good woman knows her past, understands her present and forces toward the future.
A good woman does not live in fear of the future because of her past.
Instead, she understands that her life experiences are merely lessons meant to bring her closer to self-knowledge and unconditional self-love.
~*~*~*~
A long time ago I gave those words posted above to a friend of mine as a gift she kept them and read them many time over the years ..we lost touch for a time and life went on still she held the words close to her heart waiting for the chance to give them back to me and so she has .. Thank you my friend my sister of the heart .. may the Goddess bless and hold you close always.
Love Foxie
With a little bit of faith and a lot of luck
A friend sent this to me and I thought it wonderful enough to share with you folks .. enjoy ! oh and pass it on to the next guy ....
His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, whiletrying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help comingfrom a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screamingand struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from whatcould have been a slow and terrifying death. The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparsesurroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introducedhimself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. "I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life." "No, I ca n't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmerreplied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son cameto the door of the family hovel. "Is that your son?" the nobleman asked. "Yes," the farmer replied proudly. "I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education myown son will enjoy If the lad is anything like his father, he'll nodoubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did. Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time,graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went onto become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming,the discoverer of Penicillin. Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog wasstricken with pneumonia. What saved his life this time? Penicillin. The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill .. His son's name? Sir Winston Churchill. Someone once said: What goes around comes around. Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. Sing like nobody's listening. Live like it's Heaven on Earth. It's National Friendship Wee k. Send this to everyone you consider A FRIEND. Pass this on, and brighten some one's day.
May there always be work for your hands to do; May your purse always hold a coin or two; May the sun always shine on your windowpane; May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain; May the hand of a friend always be near you; May the Gods fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, whiletrying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help comingfrom a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screamingand struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from whatcould have been a slow and terrifying death. The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparsesurroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introducedhimself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. "I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life." "No, I ca n't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmerreplied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son cameto the door of the family hovel. "Is that your son?" the nobleman asked. "Yes," the farmer replied proudly. "I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education myown son will enjoy If the lad is anything like his father, he'll nodoubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did. Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time,graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went onto become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming,the discoverer of Penicillin. Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog wasstricken with pneumonia. What saved his life this time? Penicillin. The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill .. His son's name? Sir Winston Churchill. Someone once said: What goes around comes around. Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. Sing like nobody's listening. Live like it's Heaven on Earth. It's National Friendship Wee k. Send this to everyone you consider A FRIEND. Pass this on, and brighten some one's day.
May there always be work for your hands to do; May your purse always hold a coin or two; May the sun always shine on your windowpane; May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain; May the hand of a friend always be near you; May the Gods fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
18.2.07
The Pit ( short story for yer pleasure)
The Lord looked askance at the Fool, who was busy making faces behind the Lady's back.
"So, which of your Aspects have you enjoyed the most?" he said.
The Fool looked up, wiggling his ears.
"Stop that!" grinned the Lord, "I'd really like to know!"
"Well.....I suppose that it would be a toss-up between Dionysus, Tyl Eulenspiegel, and Krishna, I guess. Tyl had a whopping good time, Dionysus got to be pretty much drunk, mostly, and Krishna had those sweet little milk-maids......THAT was a good time! But Coyote gets to do most everything. I guess I like Him the best."
The Lord sat back against a tree, folded His hands, and smiled.
"Yeah, ol' Coyote gets to do everything all right...except catch the Roadrunner," he said.
"Well," said the Fool, with a lopsided grin, "I guess I'm the only One of Us that perpetually chases Myself!"
The Lady turned, and, Aspecting the Nymph, dropped a large grasshopper down the Fool's back. She giggled, and ran off over the fields of Summerland.
The Lord laughed, pounding His fists on the ground as the Fool jumped and twisted, trying to reach the insect.
Between whoops of laughter, He said, "Did you ever figure out what 'Updoc' was?"
"Shaddup!" said the Fool.
The Fool leaned back against the brick wall of the alley and said, "I'd like to tell you a story. It seems that a man fell into a deep pit, and couldn't get himself out. He was in a world of hurt, and pretty unhappy. Pretty soon, a Subjectivist type of person came along and said, 'I feel for you down there,' but did nothing."
"An Objectivist wandered by next, and said, 'It's logical that someone would fall down there.' But he just stood around looking too."
"A Pharisee said, 'Only bad people fall into a pit,' and put his nose in the air and kept walking."
The Fool took a drag from his cigarette and then flipped it expertly into a nearby puddle. Somewhere in the distance of the city a siren wailed.
"Then, a mathematician calculated how he fell into the pit. But all he did was calculate."
"A news reporter wanted the exclusive story on his pit, but was too busy interviewing everyone in sight to help."
"A fanatic fundamentalist shouted, 'You deserve your pit!'"
"Then a government tax-man asked if he was paying taxes on the pit."
"A self-pitying person then whined, 'You haven't seen anything until you've seen MY pit!'"
"Then a Christian Scientist came by, and said, 'Just believe that you're not in a pit.' But that didn't seem to help." He paused, and brushed His hair back from His eyes. After looking around that those who were listening, He continued.
"An optimist said, 'Things could be worse!' But the pessimist disagreed, and said, 'Things -will- get worse!' "
"A Wiccan said, 'MURPHY! You &*$%^#, while a New Ager jumped into the pit to share the experience." A couple of people laughed at this, a bit nervously.
"A Baha'i looked over the edge of the pit and said, 'See the pit as a Spiritual Experience!' while a Moslem murmured that it was God's Will that he was in the pit."
"A Satanist just laughed at the man in the pit and kept walking."
"A conspiracist rubbed his hands together in glee, and said, '-They- threw you into the pit! I -knew- it!'"
"A Jew said, 'Why are we -always- in a pit?' "
"A Communist shouted 'Why are you in the People's Pit without permission?'"
"An Alcoholic muttered to himself, 'It's not -my- fault you're in the pit.....' "
"A Liberal said, 'Those Conservatives must have dug this pit!'"
"A Conservative said, 'See where Liberalism has gotten you?' "
"A TV Evangelist came by and promptly took up a collection from the bystanders."
" Then, several well-meaning people came by, and wanted to help, but they were too busy arguing whether to throw him a ladder, or a shovel, or to hire a helicopter with a rope ladder, or to call the fire department or police to manage to get anything done."
"A well-known radio cult hunter said, between requests for money, 'See! Satan threw you into the pit!'"
"A doper looked blearily at him, and said, a bit incoherently, 'Far out! Got any more pit?'" "A Hindu said that the man's karma had put him into the pit, and a television news commentator shouted, 'Man in a pit! Why is the government responsible?'"
But then, a Good Samaritan came along, looked at the man in the pit and at all the others standing around pursuing their own agendas, and said, quietly, 'Here are two shovels. Let's get you out of the pit.'"
The Fool looked around at His listeners, grinned, and said, "He that hath ears to hear with, let him hear."
He shoved His hands into his jacket, and walked away thru the puddles, idly kicking at an empty beer can.
"Pretty good!" said the Lady.
"Maybe," said the Fool, "But not up to the Sermon On The Mount."
"That one -was- one of Your best," She agreed.
"Yeah," He said, "But even then, they ignored most of it. Oh well. Some of it caught on, at least."
"It takes a while," said the Lord, "But they -are- learning."
"Yes, they are," said the Fool, "But they have a long way to go yet."
The Lady smiled warmly, and said, "They'll get there."
Thus it was, and so it is, and evermore shall be so!
"So, which of your Aspects have you enjoyed the most?" he said.
The Fool looked up, wiggling his ears.
"Stop that!" grinned the Lord, "I'd really like to know!"
"Well.....I suppose that it would be a toss-up between Dionysus, Tyl Eulenspiegel, and Krishna, I guess. Tyl had a whopping good time, Dionysus got to be pretty much drunk, mostly, and Krishna had those sweet little milk-maids......THAT was a good time! But Coyote gets to do most everything. I guess I like Him the best."
The Lord sat back against a tree, folded His hands, and smiled.
"Yeah, ol' Coyote gets to do everything all right...except catch the Roadrunner," he said.
"Well," said the Fool, with a lopsided grin, "I guess I'm the only One of Us that perpetually chases Myself!"
The Lady turned, and, Aspecting the Nymph, dropped a large grasshopper down the Fool's back. She giggled, and ran off over the fields of Summerland.
The Lord laughed, pounding His fists on the ground as the Fool jumped and twisted, trying to reach the insect.
Between whoops of laughter, He said, "Did you ever figure out what 'Updoc' was?"
"Shaddup!" said the Fool.
The Fool leaned back against the brick wall of the alley and said, "I'd like to tell you a story. It seems that a man fell into a deep pit, and couldn't get himself out. He was in a world of hurt, and pretty unhappy. Pretty soon, a Subjectivist type of person came along and said, 'I feel for you down there,' but did nothing."
"An Objectivist wandered by next, and said, 'It's logical that someone would fall down there.' But he just stood around looking too."
"A Pharisee said, 'Only bad people fall into a pit,' and put his nose in the air and kept walking."
The Fool took a drag from his cigarette and then flipped it expertly into a nearby puddle. Somewhere in the distance of the city a siren wailed.
"Then, a mathematician calculated how he fell into the pit. But all he did was calculate."
"A news reporter wanted the exclusive story on his pit, but was too busy interviewing everyone in sight to help."
"A fanatic fundamentalist shouted, 'You deserve your pit!'"
"Then a government tax-man asked if he was paying taxes on the pit."
"A self-pitying person then whined, 'You haven't seen anything until you've seen MY pit!'"
"Then a Christian Scientist came by, and said, 'Just believe that you're not in a pit.' But that didn't seem to help." He paused, and brushed His hair back from His eyes. After looking around that those who were listening, He continued.
"An optimist said, 'Things could be worse!' But the pessimist disagreed, and said, 'Things -will- get worse!' "
"A Wiccan said, 'MURPHY! You &*$%^#, while a New Ager jumped into the pit to share the experience." A couple of people laughed at this, a bit nervously.
"A Baha'i looked over the edge of the pit and said, 'See the pit as a Spiritual Experience!' while a Moslem murmured that it was God's Will that he was in the pit."
"A Satanist just laughed at the man in the pit and kept walking."
"A conspiracist rubbed his hands together in glee, and said, '-They- threw you into the pit! I -knew- it!'"
"A Jew said, 'Why are we -always- in a pit?' "
"A Communist shouted 'Why are you in the People's Pit without permission?'"
"An Alcoholic muttered to himself, 'It's not -my- fault you're in the pit.....' "
"A Liberal said, 'Those Conservatives must have dug this pit!'"
"A Conservative said, 'See where Liberalism has gotten you?' "
"A TV Evangelist came by and promptly took up a collection from the bystanders."
" Then, several well-meaning people came by, and wanted to help, but they were too busy arguing whether to throw him a ladder, or a shovel, or to hire a helicopter with a rope ladder, or to call the fire department or police to manage to get anything done."
"A well-known radio cult hunter said, between requests for money, 'See! Satan threw you into the pit!'"
"A doper looked blearily at him, and said, a bit incoherently, 'Far out! Got any more pit?'" "A Hindu said that the man's karma had put him into the pit, and a television news commentator shouted, 'Man in a pit! Why is the government responsible?'"
But then, a Good Samaritan came along, looked at the man in the pit and at all the others standing around pursuing their own agendas, and said, quietly, 'Here are two shovels. Let's get you out of the pit.'"
The Fool looked around at His listeners, grinned, and said, "He that hath ears to hear with, let him hear."
He shoved His hands into his jacket, and walked away thru the puddles, idly kicking at an empty beer can.
"Pretty good!" said the Lady.
"Maybe," said the Fool, "But not up to the Sermon On The Mount."
"That one -was- one of Your best," She agreed.
"Yeah," He said, "But even then, they ignored most of it. Oh well. Some of it caught on, at least."
"It takes a while," said the Lord, "But they -are- learning."
"Yes, they are," said the Fool, "But they have a long way to go yet."
The Lady smiled warmly, and said, "They'll get there."
Thus it was, and so it is, and evermore shall be so!
self abuse.. sheesh never again
OMG have pity on me .. I abused myself by allowing the 12 old to have a sleepover party.. pre teen girls giggle and laugh in highpitched squeaky voices.. my ears hurt .. they go to bed at some ungodly hour only to bounce up bright eyed and bushy tailed at 5 am oh and they wake the rest of the house as well .. gah I want to go to sleep already and its only 10 am .. and the littleones are up ..nope no rest for me
what do you feed kids that dont like chocolate malt-o-meal sheesh the stay over doesnt "do" malt-o-meal not even chocolate.. okkk cold Pizza? oh no thanks doesnt like pineapple stuff .. humm wellllll what to feed em? oh cute the kid wants donuts .. the bakery is NOT opened today .. Nope not gonna drive to the store .. sooo now what .. oh yeh cake mix in the cuboards .. sure kids I can do that .. still havent had that first cup of coffee give me a minute please ... 20 minutes go by NOW I am awake .. where was I oh yeh cake ...good gawd they ate a whole 13x9 cake ..I didnt get any...musta been good cause they inhaled it by time I was pourning my second cuppa coffee. :: snickers to self:: the stay over kid went home with a huge sugar buzz.. hope her folks have fun with her..
what do you feed kids that dont like chocolate malt-o-meal sheesh the stay over doesnt "do" malt-o-meal not even chocolate.. okkk cold Pizza? oh no thanks doesnt like pineapple stuff .. humm wellllll what to feed em? oh cute the kid wants donuts .. the bakery is NOT opened today .. Nope not gonna drive to the store .. sooo now what .. oh yeh cake mix in the cuboards .. sure kids I can do that .. still havent had that first cup of coffee give me a minute please ... 20 minutes go by NOW I am awake .. where was I oh yeh cake ...good gawd they ate a whole 13x9 cake ..I didnt get any...musta been good cause they inhaled it by time I was pourning my second cuppa coffee. :: snickers to self:: the stay over kid went home with a huge sugar buzz.. hope her folks have fun with her..
17.2.07
UTHO
::yawns rubs eyes :: I just woke up to the fact I have this blog.. omg I goofed and screwed around and nearly forgot my name and my stage .. that would have been to much I would have lost the wonderful songs sung by a demon and That would have broken my heart .. He is such a gift you know.. and I do treasure him greatly.. He makes many folks smile with his joy of life and all that goes on around him..thank you dear friend and your beautiful wife for waiting for me to re appear once more.
Never again will I be so forgetful of this wonderful toy .. blessings on you Deepak and beautiful Adha for waiting for me to return..
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